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Hakuna Matata
It means no worries
Created on 2004-10-18 08:58:59 (#4870206), last updated 2007-05-17
2,048 comments received, 2,763 comments posted
Basic Account [Gift]
436 Journal Entries, 1 Tag, 22 Memories, 0 Virtual Gifts, 14 Userpics
Basic Info| Name: | Wez 'Almighty' Morris |
|---|---|
| Birthdate: | 1986-05-10 |
| Location: | Portsmouth, Hampshire, United Kingdom |
| Website: | Portsmouth Lacrosse |
BioI'm Wez. And I'm not human. Humans seem to have complex lives, tend to be irrational and self serving. I'm just an observer of the human race. Letting them continue with their daily routine totally oblivious.
In order to blend in, I've had to act as one of them. I find a source of income, attend the learning institutes and blend into thier social enviroments.
I arrived somewhere in Johannesburg (A large city in a country called South Africa). There, I adapted to thier culture and adopted thier accent before traveling north to England disguised as a foreigner. The accent seems to throw them off and they seem to accept my total ignorance about thier country.
However, the exact reason I'm here and where I came from is kept a secret for your protection. There are those who wouldn't take kindly to my kind on your planet.
This is me. My origional disguise came in the shape of a small tabby kitten but I found communication difficult. You humans seem to be ignorant of who is the greater species on your planet. Since then, I re-evaluated my appearance and came up with what you see now. Its an oddly primative form in the galactic scale of things, but serves its purpose. The concept of having a nose freaks me out a bit, as does the lack of advanced sensory organs. But I'm getting used to it.
Using this disguise, I'm able to blend in leaving the humans none the wiser.
That was Bruce, my faithful companion. He's the bonsai tree, not the phone. Bonsai trees are the most calculating beings in existance. Every action of thier existance is considered and evaluated, then alternatives are considered and evaluated before a decision is made. I have never beaten one at chess. Have you?
Fortunately, they spend so much time calculating each movement that they dont move much in thier lifespan. This handicap has so far stopped them becomming a galactic superpower and restricted them to simple household flora. But flora smart enough to do your tax returns and balance your accounting.
Sadly bruce passed away not too long ago, I think he missed home. I do.
In order to blend in, I've had to act as one of them. I find a source of income, attend the learning institutes and blend into thier social enviroments.
I arrived somewhere in Johannesburg (A large city in a country called South Africa). There, I adapted to thier culture and adopted thier accent before traveling north to England disguised as a foreigner. The accent seems to throw them off and they seem to accept my total ignorance about thier country.
However, the exact reason I'm here and where I came from is kept a secret for your protection. There are those who wouldn't take kindly to my kind on your planet.
This is me. My origional disguise came in the shape of a small tabby kitten but I found communication difficult. You humans seem to be ignorant of who is the greater species on your planet. Since then, I re-evaluated my appearance and came up with what you see now. Its an oddly primative form in the galactic scale of things, but serves its purpose. The concept of having a nose freaks me out a bit, as does the lack of advanced sensory organs. But I'm getting used to it.
Using this disguise, I'm able to blend in leaving the humans none the wiser.
That was Bruce, my faithful companion. He's the bonsai tree, not the phone. Bonsai trees are the most calculating beings in existance. Every action of thier existance is considered and evaluated, then alternatives are considered and evaluated before a decision is made. I have never beaten one at chess. Have you?
Fortunately, they spend so much time calculating each movement that they dont move much in thier lifespan. This handicap has so far stopped them becomming a galactic superpower and restricted them to simple household flora. But flora smart enough to do your tax returns and balance your accounting.
Sadly bruce passed away not too long ago, I think he missed home. I do.
ConnectInterests (60):
able and baker, b3ta, bash.org, bill bailey, blue, bonsai trees, cats, cinema, computer games, damien rice, dave gorman, discounts, disney films, eddie izzard, family guy, films, final fantasy, friends, girls, kingdom of loathing, kissing, kittens, lacrosse, lax, leadership, lions, lukozade, magic, magic the gathering, mail, meeting new people, movies, msn messenger, music, paladins, penny arcade, pirates, play fighting, red hot chili peppers, red hot chilli peppers, religion, robots, rock music, romance, simon pegg, smashing pumpkins, south africa, spaced, sports, star wars, the punisher, vg cats, vodka, webcomics, white ninja, white russian cocktails, women, x-men, xbox, zebrahead
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